val922's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Circle the Buzzards I admit I have been avoiding posting for the simple reason that I hate to post anything negative about anyone but the facts of the matter are - not everyone I come in contact with is going to do nice things all the time. I admit further that this is a mistake I have made before and one I will probably make again because that�s the kind of person I am. This post shall be a furtherment of this story Roomie Remiss. First I should point out that the previous post was based on my faith that as a �friend� Binner was telling the truth which turns out to be slightly less than accurate. He told us around the 3rd of August that he was hired and would be attending orientation on the 10th for VIPM and that his actual start date would be on the 17th. It turns out that he did indeed attend an interview with VIPM but was not hired. He spent the next 2 weeks secretly looking for a job and building himself and VIPM up to a point that he couldn�t hope to reach and offering me a job that was pure fantasy. D and I had become suspicious offering him several chances to come clean but he refused to tell us the truth (I believe that he honestly thought he was in to deep to come clean and retain D�s friendship). Perhaps all he thought he needed was time to get a different job so that he could build a plausible bridge between what had been a lie and the truth. I wonder if he�ll ever know just how close he came to pulling it all back together. His �note�book says he started a job on the 17th of August with GC and the Orientation invitation confirms this. That�s right; we found proof of the lies. If you�ve read me before you know that I believe in a minimum of 3 Sides to Every Story and withhold my own conclusions until such time as I feel sufficiently informed to make an educated guess. Which, for the most part is all the closer anyone ever gets to the truth. For truth is most assuredly relative to each individual. Enough of that � if I start doing that karmic psychobabble thing we�ll be here all day, I just want to get the story told as I am certain you just want to get it read. By September 5th he had received a paycheck and even though I warned him not to put it in the ATM and especially not after business hours he did it anyway claiming that it couldn�t be helped because he was at work all day � which by this point was questionable. He was staying up until all hours of the night, not getting up until 3 in the afternoon and running to his girls place more often than I really think he went to work. D and I had reached our breaking point as with the money and the job offer it was always the same story � not his fault, couldn�t be helped, just a couple more days. We had agreed that when they got back (both D and Binner have every other weekend visitation with their kid(s) ) from the weekend that this was his final opportunity to get his act together or get out. On the 10th he gave us 1/3 of what was owed (rent $200 bimonthly and $189.16 for his cell phone bill) with a promise of the 2nd 1/3 on the 13th and the final 1/3 for the 15th . As well as positively confirming that my orientation would be on Friday morning at 9 AM � 4 PM. In the end he only bought him another 3 days before we were all back to the boiling point again. By the 13th the bank had supposedly told him it wouldn�t be available until the 14th. He went to �work� on Wednesday(13th). Thursday night he called and said he was stopping by his girls then on his way home. Friday morning when I attempted to call his cell it went straight to voice. When I showed up at the address I was given for my orientation it didn�t exist. I wasn�t surprised. I wasn�t even angry � the sad part was I expected it. He sent an e-mail at 3:45 that afternoon but I didn�t receive it until the next day. He didn�t come home Friday night and his cell went straight to voice. I also have to wonder for someone who had no access to money on the 11th of Sept. how he managed to BUY a router so he could have internet. Especially since he�d told us that the router was given to him by JJ (supposedly his boss at VIPM). Here�s a tip for you - If you�re going to lie don�t leave the receipt where it can be found and determined to have been bought miles from where you said it was given. Broken promises lay all around D and I like shrapnel so we made our final ultimate decision without discussing it with him, he�d left us no alternative. We locked him out of the house. He showed up Saturday morning about 9:30ish and upon finding the chain engaged neither knocked nor called to have us let him in. A couple of hours later (approximately 11 AM) he did call and said he�d not only lost his job but his EX had sicked FRO on him for earning more money than before and that FRO had frozen his bank account and that he�d call back later to work things out. He may well have lost his job with GC (due to tardiness - my guess) and FRO may have frozen his accounts but according to letters found amongst the rubble that was his bedroom it was his own fault. I�ll not get into the specifics of his child support as it may well be possible things aren�t what they appear. It would also seem that he has been into some bad business from the moment he got here, with his own bank. Those things aren�t conclusive and so moving right along. We had a wedding to attend (which I very much want to talk about next post) at 12:30 PM so without further delay we left him locked out and attended the function as planned. Neither of us knew at the time that it would be 12 hours before we got home. Upon our return he was standing in the driveway calling us. Leaving D to deal with it I understand the conversation went a little like this: Binner: So is this an on the street kind of situation? We returned his clothes, books, movies, games, acoustic guitar and sentimental possessions but we have retained certain items of value to settle the debt he left. During the course of making sure his things were returned to him we learned that his mother pays for most of his responsibilities and was aware that the behavior we experienced is typical of him but that she had hoped living with D would teach him how to get his life straightened out. There are a couple of things I know for sure � You can�t help someone who won�t help themselves. You can�t help someone who doesn�t think they have a problem. You can�t (shouldn�t) expect someone to change if they don�t want to. D would say,�My father once told me, if you find yourself in a hole stop digging.� I feel bad for D though he�s known Binner for 16 some odd years and that friendship is d-e-d dead. He�s been sullen and broody wondering just how much of those years were lies, trying to define friendship by the good deeds one has performed for the other and of course flipping into the jaded jokes at his friends expense. The latter of which I just had to ask him to stop because I didn�t feel that way even if I understood where it came from. I�m not sure how I feel about it right now, sort of like buzzards ravaging the remains of the freshly dead. Or like a homeless and hungry person riffling through his dead pockets for spare change. Whatever it is, it just doesn�t feel right. 4:44 p.m. - Tuesday, Sept. 19, 2006 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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